President Obama has chosen a former Microsoft executive, Kurt DelBene, to replace Jeffrey D. Zients as head of the effort to finish repairs on the government’s health insurance website, administration officials said on Tuesday. “I’m bringing in years of experience to turn this project around,” commented DelBene. “We want to create a website that is functional and easy for the American public to understand. For example, once an individual has reached their lifetime payout limit the website will simply display the ‘blue screen of death’.”

Snapchat, the high-tech start up that lets users transmit text messages and images that disappear a few seconds after being sent, has recently turned down a $3 billion dollar offer from Facebook. When asked for a comment on the situation a high ranking yet unnamed official at the company replied, “We believe that there is a lot more money to be made by taking all this stuff everyone thinks is getting erased and selling it to the Russian Mob.”

In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes. –Benjamin Franklin

Not so fast there Ben. –Google

Google’s New Company Calico To Try to Cheat Death
www.technologyreview.com/view/…/google-to-try-to-solve-death-lol/
Sep 17, 2013 – A new company launched by Google will seek to extend human life spans.

Google dodges billions in taxes with Bermuda tax haven
The Global Dispatch ‎- 1 day ago
The UK tax authority has indicated it is investigating Google.