Welcome to the latest Facebook application! For the 25,000,000 fans of the original Farmville, we now introduce the next generation: Corporate Farmville! While planting and tending to small plots of land has its own unique charm, Corporate Farmville takes the entire process to the next level. Start the game by incorporating your business in a state with no substantial farming but extremely lax corporate liability laws (yes, we are looking at you Delaware!). Once your paper work is approved, use money from your quasi-ethical IPO to purchase locally owned farms. Maximize your profits through a variety of processes: gratuitous lawsuits, misused government subsidies, and blatantly illegal partnerships. Start out as a simple corporate henchman and become master of all agriculture by perfecting a machine that spits out fast food quality hamburger meat 24/7!

America Online recently announced a new service aimed at protecting children from the dangers of the internet. For only $9.99 a month AOL’s ‘Safe Social’ will help parents monitor what their children do online.  A representative from the company explained how the system works.  “This setup only allows your children to connect to the internet through AOL’s proprietary dial-up service.  This all but guarantees they won’t find anyone else to chat with while on the computer.”