Free Bird

President Bush pardoned two turkeys, Stars and Stripes, during the annual White House Thanksgiving tradition. When asked about the status of those who did not receive clemency and are still being held at undisclosed locations around the world, the President replied, “I want to be clear on this– we do not torture… Let’s just say they’ve been ‘tenderized.’ Heh heh heh. Yeah, that sounds much better.”